MindMap-BookSummary-SexDrive
April 23, 2017 Leave a comment
MindMap-BookSummary-SexDrive
- About The Book
- Title: Sex Drive-In Pursuit of Female Desire
- Author: Clayton
- ISBN: 978 174175 6661
- Chapters: 10
- Pages: 362
- myRating: 5 Stars
- Audience:
- 1. If you are a wife, read this book
- 2. If you are a husband, read this book
- 3. Others, do not read this book, it’s not for you. It does not apply to you!
- Crisis in women’s sexuality
- “It’s the end of another long day and you’ve barely survived it. You stand at the mirror and brush your teeth, scrutinizing the lines on your face. You wonder, as you open the little bottle, when you started using cream specifically for the under-eye region. Was that the point when you started ageing? You crawl into bed and rest your body against your partner’s solid form. Although he is also tired, his mouth finds your neck and his hands bring you closer. But you don’t want the intimacy, the physical connection. You’d like to sleep, read your novel, or analyze why your co-worker is so mercurial. Besides, you don’t feel the least bit sexy, and everybody knows that’s the key to everything. When it comes to women’s priorities, is sex on top? A study discussed later in the book estimated that 43 per cent of American women are dissatisfied with sex.1 A Canadian journal reported that 30–35 per cent of women experienced a lack of sexual desire.2 Research in Germany found that once a woman is in a secure relationship her sex drive begins to plummet. Women are collectively not in the mood because inside our cerebral cortex, where arousal originates, there is a to-do list that is never-ending. And just when it looks like you’ve nailed all the tasks, another lot file in, obliterating any thought of sex.”
Sex therapy does not have a good success rate.
Who in the relationship is in the best position to fix the sexual stalemate?
Is it you? Is it him?
- “It’s the end of another long day and you’ve barely survived it. You stand at the mirror and brush your teeth, scrutinizing the lines on your face. You wonder, as you open the little bottle, when you started using cream specifically for the under-eye region. Was that the point when you started ageing? You crawl into bed and rest your body against your partner’s solid form. Although he is also tired, his mouth finds your neck and his hands bring you closer. But you don’t want the intimacy, the physical connection. You’d like to sleep, read your novel, or analyze why your co-worker is so mercurial. Besides, you don’t feel the least bit sexy, and everybody knows that’s the key to everything. When it comes to women’s priorities, is sex on top? A study discussed later in the book estimated that 43 per cent of American women are dissatisfied with sex.1 A Canadian journal reported that 30–35 per cent of women experienced a lack of sexual desire.2 Research in Germany found that once a woman is in a secure relationship her sex drive begins to plummet. Women are collectively not in the mood because inside our cerebral cortex, where arousal originates, there is a to-do list that is never-ending. And just when it looks like you’ve nailed all the tasks, another lot file in, obliterating any thought of sex.”
- What is DIN?
- Double Income No Sex
“Libido refers to our sexual drive, but also our general vigor and enthusiasm. Low libido leads to reduced interest in sex and reduced creative expression of our sexuality. However, rather than dissipating altogether, our libido often gets funneled from sex into other areas of our life: Our career can gobble that intense, heady focus. As can our homes, dinner tables and wardrobes. And most undoubtedly, a singular absorption with our children can supersede even the early, blossoming stage of limerence. In other words, often it is not that our libido is low, but rather that our creative energy is being directed elsewhere, from seduction and carnality to more contained pursuits.”
- Double Income No Sex
- Chapter 10: Bringing Sexy Back
- most cases, the advice given to women with low libido is talk to your doctor but most women, this is the last thing they want to do other advices: do home research, consult self-help books other forms of treatment: acupuncture, herbal remedies or sexuality workshop when you visit a doctor.
- Diagnostics:
- 1. medical history
- 2. hormonal status
- 3. changes in sexual interest
- 4. trouble with arousal
- 5. orgasm or vaginal dryness
- 6. pain
- 7. emotional distress
- 8. use of medication
- Category of Sexual Problems
- 1. can’t get it up
- 2. can’t get it in
- 3. can’t be bothered
- 5 Scale of Sexual Desire
- 1. Initiatory—here you are motivated to have sex, look out for sexual opportunities and feel, in her words, ‘horny’
2. receptive—in the next level, you are receptive to sex and willing to engage if your partner initiates
3. available—here you are prepared to have sex, but don’t feel spontaneous lust
4. neutral—your motivation to engage in sex is low
5. disinclined—you experience no lust or interest in sexual activity.
- 1. Initiatory—here you are motivated to have sex, look out for sexual opportunities and feel, in her words, ‘horny’
- FSFI-Female Sexual Function Index
- Compiled By:
- Rigel Arcayan, 20131001
- blindcaveman.wordpress.com